Brazil 2014! Rachel is beside herself with excitement at the thought of Brazil hosting the 2014 World Cup. We've done the maths: Nelson will be 9, just the age to be fully immersed in the wonder of an event such as this (I remember bawling my eyes out when England lost in the 1990 World Cup semis... but this is Brazil, they won't lose). Rachel is adamant we will be going to a game from wherever in the world we will be living at that time.

I spoke with some of my students today about this. They are all very happy with the news, but the debate for them is whether Natal will be selected as a host city. On the plus side Natal is safe, has a thriving tourist industry and an international airport. Some architect has already drawn up plans for a new stadium of 65,000 but if they have a stage in the north east it may well be in Salvador, Fortaleza or Recife - the bigger capitals.

Other Brazilians are concerned with the cost and investment in sports when the country has other more pressing concerns over education, security and healthcare. But, as another of my students - a university lecturer - pointed out, the money for infrastructure will come from FIFA and the project will create jobs and hopefully aid technological development in security as well as increase the profile of Brazil internationally.

Life is life. We've all had a bit of illness lately, Rach especially with the killer morning sickness. And for me, I have been gingerly putting on shirts and strapping on seatbelts after I got thoroughly lobstered at the beach on Sunday. It's also quite a busy time at work. As my Dad would say, life is life.

ACCORDING TO BOB: The view from the Andes.
According to Bob, Pinochet remained remarkably popular in Chile despite his despotic ways. Still, today the country has a very right wing, conservative bias. There is a socialist government led by a woman, but the opposition is storng and the most widely read newspaper in the country is ultra-blue. During Pinochet's time inflation got out of hand and the currency sky-rocketed. 1000 Chilean Pesas is 1 English Pound. Which means, that the Chilean version of "Who wants to be a millionaire?" is actually only (at least in English Pounds) "Who wants to be a thousandaire?"

We're expecting another baby! This picture shows an 11 week, 4cm long baby who, if God wills, shall keep growing and pop out next May. And that jagged line represents the beat of a tiny heart pumping. Please pray for Rach who has real bad morning sickness and for all us making an adjustment to a family of four.

101. Just a small note to say that this post takes us past the 100 entries mark on this blog. Thanks to those of you that read it and take an interest in our lives in Brazil. We miss you all!

I've not been feeling myself, I'm a bit run-down and worn out and in need of some sleep to recharge my batteries. I've been teaching some Advanced student English Idioms for health - such as the above. Strangely, I've spent most of the week feeling "a bit out of it" with a cold, nose, cough "bug" that everyone seems to have. But, "I'm on the way up" and will be "back in shape" in no time, I reckon.

Brazilian GP. So English sports took up it's usual place in the also-ran column of the record books. Rugby, Formula 1 - close to winning but not quite. Brazilians follow F1 very closely, especially when it's in Brazil. They have a sparkling history in the sport - Nelson Piquet and Ayrton Senna are the heroes. Ayrton Senna's high speed death on the track in 1994 produced a reaction in the country similar to Diana's high speed death in 1997. After a few years in the wilderness cheering for the ultimately unsuccessful Rubens Barrichelo, Brazilians have their own young star - Felipe Massa. But even here, Lewis Hamilton is well known and popular. But if you want a British youngster to cheer at the moment I suggest plumping for Hamilton-lookalike Theo Walcott. The 18 year old became the youngest Brit to score in the Champions League earlier this week. He actually scored 2 and made 1 in Arsenal's 7-0 thumping of Slavia Prague. Watch it here.

ACCORDING TO BOB: The view from the Andes.
According to Bob, the Andes separating Chile from Argentina are a cultural as well as a physical barrier. Whereas, Argentina and Brazil historically and culturally draw from Europe and in some cases Africa, Chileans have tended to look out to the massive expanse of the Pacific and their closest neighbours in the north Peru and Bolivia. A small example of what this means: Santiago was conspicuously lacking in racial diversity. I did not see a single black person in our visit there.

Wireless and Bean. Brazilians love Rowan Atkinson as Mr.Bean... and the fact that he hardly speaks means nothing is lost in translation. It's just good old fashioned slap-stick with a whiff of British nerdiness thrown in. Oh, and thanks to a new laptop with wireless connection (courtesy of Rachel´s folks for her birthday) I can write this whilst sitting in front of the tele watching Mr.Bean, hey hey! It's an ancient re-run - Mr.Bean at the pool - which I last saw about 15 years ago.

Things I miss about England #11: asparagus, avocado and tea. It's not that I enjoy these things mixed together, but they are three great consumables which Brazilians don't really "do". They have them alright, at a price, but the quality isn't so good. Asparagus once appeared at the local supermarket and so I bought up a packet instantly, only to discover it cost twice as much as the fresh beef I had bought as well. Chileans on the other hand, now they grow aspargus and avocado and they drink tea, good tea, by the bucketload. Our first meal in Chile was a shared asparagus omlette with an avocado and beef sandwich washed down with two cups of tea. Cracking stuff.

Things I love about Brazil #70: the travelling circus. Two of Nelson's favourite things at the moment are bicycles and monkeys. These two things were unexpectedly brought together today when we went to visit the Koslov Circus which was in town.

Travelling circuses are largely consigned to the history books in England, with the likes of Alton Towers, theme parks and a score of other family attractions proving to be more spectacular, corporate and popular. In Brazil, it seems running off to join the circus is still an option - especially if you're a woman with a beard, or you don't mind having knives thrown at you. The low cost of labour and the lack of too many competing local attractions in the vast expanse of the country seem to me to be possible reasons for the maintainance of this quirky sideshow of the entertainment industry.

So we took Nelson to see the spectacular this afternoon. There were the usual attractions - a father and son trapeze show, some strange animals (a small cow and a llama) and the clowns who did a routine with some kids from the audience. Nelson was mildly interested until the final act which really caught his attention. A big monkey, dressed in a pink dress (with pink bloomers on underneath) was brought onto the stage and cajoled into performing tricks such as walking on stilts and dancing to forro music. The grand finale was the monkey riding a bicycle round the stage. I was genuinely impressed, which is to say nothing of Nelson's reaction.

ACCORDING TO BOB: The view from the Andes.
According to Bob, apart from asparagus and avocado, Chile's primary exports are Salmon and wine. Most Chilean wine is grown in the central region of the country and some of it is made exclusively for export. While we were there we bought a bottle at the local supermarket priced for the equivalent of UK1.50 pounds. Talk about value for money.

ACCORDING TO BOB: The view from the Andes.
Introducing a new little series of posts based around the observations of my good friend Roberto Troncoso (pictured) who we stayed with in Santiago. Roberto is a thoroughly interesting fellow with plenty to say about South America, Chile and conditions therein. So, here's the first one. According to Bob... the 29th of every month is gnocci day in Argentina. This roughly corresponds to workers' pay day and it is apparently traditional for Argentinians to spend their first cheque on gnocci at an Italian restaurant. Is this really true, I ask myself? Well, it is according to Bob.

More flight anecdotes. I'm not about to write a multi-thousand word diatribe (see posts in August after BRA flights) about flying around South America. However, we do still manage to find ourselves regularly embroiled in anecdote-inspiring situations. On the way to Chile, our flight out of Sao Paulo was delayed (it was a national holiday after all). Finally, we board at about 11pm and sit on the runway for some time. I doze off. I stir at the sound of the engines roaring into action and then out of nowhere my seat starts to jolt back and forth and suddenly I'm getting some wiry fingers jabbed into my ribs and, worryingly, it's not Rachel. I'm not sure if it was then or later, but at some moment I came to the realisation that on a flight of some 200 passengers I, with a stunning bolt of sheer poor luck, had found my way to the one seat directly in front of the absolutely crackers old lady.

Senhora Maria (as we discovered her name was) had taken off her seatbelt and stood up at just the time the plane's wheels were leaving the runway. She was muttering in my ear: "Chegou em Santiago? Chegou em Santiago?". In other words, the pause on the runway, the engines firing up had confused our elderly friend. She was under the impression we were landing in Chile. It took the rest of the four hours to convince her otherwise. Rachel seemed to be the only person, passenger or otherwise, who took the time to talk to her and settle her down in her seat. She would stay put for a whole 10 minutes perhaps, before springing up with youthful vigour from her chair to announce to those of us nearby that she wanted to exit the plane for we had surely arrived in Santiago. Each time she did this, I would get my hair tussled, an elbow in the eye-socket, or most amusingly a handbag dropped on me (a sleeping me, I might add) from a considerable height. Eventually, after running round the aisle after her nephew (a man in his 40s who seemed oblivious to her plight) she did what baby Nelson would have done - she sat back down and fell straight into a deep sleep for the rest of the journey. God bless the old dear, but I was praying she wasn't going to be on our return flight and, thankfully, our flight back from Santiago was devoid of bonkers women.

But, on our return we did however get delayed again, missing our final connection to Natal. (In fact, the delayed flight featured candidates from a "Mister Rio 2007" competition. With biceps the size of watermelons, I figured they would be the best guys to operate the emergency doors in the event of an emergency). So, it wasn't until lunch on Wednesday (and after one of my lessons had been cancelled) that we touched down in Natal. But it was worth it, every penny, every minute. What a great holiday - I promise some more detail of Chile next post.

Oh, and one more thing. We sat next to a chatty bloke on one flight who wanted to practice his English with us. He was from Sao Paulo, a consultant. He told us that BRA (that insufferable airline that so gyped me) approached his company to do consultancy - however, his company declined. The reason? BRA were not able to provide an account of their financial situation. Sensing they may not ever be paid, his company quite rightly pulled out.

Amusing uses of English. Continuing the theme of flying on airplanes, I'm constantly amused by the efforts of some Brazilian air stewardesses to deliver announcements in English over the airplane tannoy. I suspect they're reading off a card, or from rote, but aside from the dodgy intonation and pronunciation sometimes they mix up whole sentences.

My two favourites: "Please return your seatbelts to the upright position". Ah yes, we can't be having any seatbelts reclining noncholantly across our laps. Presumably we will have to buckle our tray tables too.

And from this most recent trip: "Please refrain from smoking cell phones until inside the terminal building". I guess the newer models are fully equipped with every mod-con... I'm just not sure which end to light up.

Casa Roberto and Paula. We managed to link up with Roberto by phone shortly after my last post. On Saturday morning he, along with his wife Paula, picked us up and drove us over to Valparaiso - just over 100kms away from Santiago, and on the coast facing the Pacific Ocean. The drive was beautiful, the roads excellent and the day turned out to be sunny and crisp. We stayed at a chalet belonging to Roberto´s sister - the views of the busy town, beach, sea and orange sunset from her patio were stunning.

Sunday we investigated the town and neighbouring Vina del Mar, sampling some local seafood and beer along the way. The beach was decidely colder than Natal. Most Chileans were fully clothed, huddled together, lying flat on the sand in order to duck out of the way of the stiniging breeze. Some foolhardy sorts, (they reminded me of my Dad) were in their swimming costumes taking a dip in the icey Pacific waves. In actual fact, swimming and surfing on most beaches on this stretch was not permitted. The beach drops away into deep and swift ocean currents and it´s considered very unsafe. In the evening, we met up with another of Roberto´s sisters and her family and their gorgeous house just around the corner for some wine and chit chat.

Apart from these small excursions we have mostly been sleeping which can´t be bad. 1 year and 4 months around young Nelson has left a sleep deficit which we are only now managing to replenish. However, we have had ample time to chat to Roberto and Paula (he speaks English, she Spanish but understands Portuguese well). I did my MA with Roberto in York and he is a quiet and thoughtful fellow whose insights into Chilean and South American society, culture and politics has given me enough material for 6 months worth of blog... watch this space for more from him.

We are back in Santiago now at their apartment. Tomorrow morning early, a taxi will take us to the airport for our return flights.

Santiago. We made into Santiago last night and crashed into bed at 4.30am in the morning. Some hilarious stories from our flights which I´ll recount later. I´m typing this from a grotty internet cafe keyboard near our hotel. Out the window - a clean and bustling Santiago, blue skies and the Andes dominating the sky line. It really is stunning here. Tomorrow, if we establish contact with my friend Roberto OK, we should be off to Valparaiso... more news later.

This time tomorrow... we will be on a plane out of Natal on our way to Chile on holiday. Next blog entry will perhaps be from Santiago.

It is a holiday because... Friday is another national holiday in Brazil, this time for the Patron Saint of Brazil, who is - nossa senhora aparecida - that is to say Mary the mother of Jesus. (I was thinking that as Protestants who don't have saints, we should lobby for our own holidays. For example, we definitely need a holiday or two to celebrate the Protestant work ethic). Also, Friday is coincidentally children's day, (like they need another special day in their honour!). I got the fright of my life this week in our supermarket when I was accosted in the nappy aisle by a shop assistant dressed as a clown trying to sell me toys in commemoration of this illustrious occasion.

Next Monday is another holiday for us, as it's national teacher's day. Now, that's what I'm talking about! And, if my proposals for a national "husbands of Brazilians day", "gringos in Natal day", "rice pudding eaters appreciation day" and "Arsenal supporters day" come to fruition I won't have to work until next March. So all these holidays create the space we need to jet off to Chile on 90% reduced air tickets thanks to a TAM promotion...

The distance from Natal, NE Brazil, to Santiago, central Chile, is... more than the distance of Natal to Lagos in Nigeria. Surprising, huh? And it's also 500 miles further than the distance from London to Timbuktu. Thanks to http://www.mapcrow.info/ for the stats.

Between now and tomorrow... we have to do sooo much! Taking a holiday mid-semester is a bit cheeky and we are cutting into our working week either side of our long weekend. This means extra planning for teachers that cover lessons and Rach has to get a presentation of the school's accounts ready by tomorrow. We'll need a holiday after the week we're having, and then we'll need another one after our holiday.

Rugby. England take on Australia in the quarter-final of the Rugby World Cup tomorrow. Surprisingly, as Brazilian sports interest usually stretches no further than football, volleyball and tennis at a push, there's been quite a bit about rugby on the sports channels here. Several students have told me they've watched some televised games recently. Two guys tell me they are even playing a bit of rugby at the university. It seems like a French guy is training them... Brazilian rugby is on a par with Brazilian cricket (which according to my Father in law is on a par with Brazilian wine) as something that Brazilians don't do very well. Don't cross your fingers for Brazil being in the next rugby world cup.

Hugby. The other thing that amuses me about all this talk of Rugby is that there are some words in Portuguese that are directly transported from English but adapted to the Portuguese pronunciation system. In particular, Brazilians pronounce R as H, especially at the start of words. (Incidentally, I'm sure this happens in reverse - the Japanese are probably amused at the British pronunciation of sushi, judo and kimono). Even Brazilians with excellent English pronunciation will still fall back to the Brazilian way of saying these words: Hock n Holl, Poppy Hocky and Hap music. The footballers Wayne Hooney, Thierry Henhy and Tomas Hosicky. And, finally the sports Hally Hacing and Hugby. When it starts with an "h", Hugby sounds a little less masculine than it usually does...

Rear-ended again. You may remember I bumped the back of somebody's car a few weeks back. Rach was taking Nelson to school last week when she was rear-ended in the same car. Again, our vehicle had not a scratch and the other guys was a wreck. It was entirely his fault so, after checking our car was OK, Rach drove on and got on with her day leaving the poor chap to get his car repaired. The car we are using right now is quite a large Ford Echo - they are very popular in Brazil, a sort of mini-SUV for town. Normally, I'd be opposed, on environmental grounds, to having such a big town car but in Natal it pays to have one because the driving is so erratic. A big car = genuinely less damage and more safety to you. On average once a week we notice the traffic is held up because somebody has switched lanes too fast and pranged the car in front of them.

Rach back today (hooray!). I think us boys have survived at home relatively well, but it just isn't the same without Rach around. She gets into night and we'll all be pleased to see her again.

Rachel's 21st birthday (again!). Today is Rachel's birthday. Coincidentally, it was also another Brazilian national holiday so we were able to have a lie in and spend time with friends and family. But, it has been quite a surreal day. We spent the morning at a hotel saying goodbye to our good pals Mariano and Barbara, and their two kids Miguel and Sophia (pictured above at Miguel's first birthday party). The family are on their way to Seattle where Mariano has a new job. As I write they are currently in the air going from Natal to Sao Paulo to New York to Seattle. We thought moving to a new country via one direct flight with one baby was tough. With two kids, and for that long, that is one obscene journey our friends are taking. Mariano starts work within a week of getting there too. They are in our prayers!

Anyway, after the tearful goodbyes Rachel and I and Nelson headed off to Camaroes, our favourite seafood restaurant for Rachel's birthday. Nelson can't sit still for more than a fraction of a second so when the three of us go out to eat the usual routine is one of us chases around the premises apologising to waitors and customers who Nelson barges into or tries to impress with his numerous tricks. (But, as has been mentioned before on this blog, Brazilians are quite fond of babies so usually there is no problem). When the food arrives we take it into turns to eat, scoffing our delicious main courses down as fast as possible so the other parent doesn't have to go hungry for too long. Despite these shenanigans it was well worth doing.

And then I drove to the airport for the second time that day to drop Rachel off to get a plane to Recife as she is flying to Rio tomorrow morning for meetings. So, I'm home alone with Nelson. My skills as Dad are certainly being pushed to the limit without Rachel around. But, so far, everything has gone more or less according to plan... not counting putting his nappy on backwards, setting the fridge on fire, putting his ear drops in his eyes, etc. So, it's been a good day if a little rushed. I think Rach has had a good time which is the main thing.

Augusto the football player. Yesterday, one of my students, a fairly shy, short, wiry teenager who lives in our neighbourhood, came into class as usual, sat down and whispered something to his friend in Portuguese. His pal, an outgoing chap, promptly announced to the class that this was to be Augusto's last day in Cultura Inglesa! Now, it's unusual to stop attending a course mid-way through the semester so we pried a little further and this is what we discovered. Augusto is moving to another state (Piaui) further north to play football professionally. Apparently, he had already been turning out in Natal for ABC 2nds and 3rds and had even played a game at the Machadao stadium before. Now he has been offered the chance of first team football at Piaui Esporte Clube. He will have to say goodbye to his folks and move to a new city several hours drive away. He will be paid (I don't know how much) and he will continue his education and perhaps his English there.

I asked my brother in law (who knows a thing or two about football) if he had heard of this team and he said he hadn't. A wikipedia search reveals them to be ranked as the 128th best team in Brazil. There are probably as many football teams in Brazil as churches (that is to say, a lot!) and Augusto will be one of thousands of young men who hope to make the big time. But, let's hope he does well. At the end of the lesson we quizzed him about his chosen career. He said his dream is to play for Brazil and perhaps in Europe. So, keep your eyes open for the thin midfielder from Natal - you heard it here first.

Gringo Maclure reporting. Speaking of Brazilian football, let me finish with a shameless plug. One thing I've enjoyed about being in Brazil is I have had more time to write (as you can tell!). I do bits and bobs mostly online. I recently joined a community of webloggers who write about football. My name is Gringo Maclure and I try to provide the South American angle to the beautiful game. My first post went up last week. You can read it at http://www.reallifenews.com/.

Random things round our way: C&A. I was in the local mall this week and found myself in C&A. The clothing chain store was priced out of the UK market in 2000. But, it's much loved in Brazil where it remains as familiar a fixture in shopping centres as a McDonalds. (Perhaps, you can tell it's a quiet weekend when this is all I have to put up).

Pineapple upside down cake. Tried to bake a cake like my Mum used to do. My first two attempts resulted in a rubbery dough, burnt to a crisp. I only discovered a few days ago that the Betty Crocker cookbook uses Farenheit and not Celcius temperatures. Third time lucky, I baked a better cake but it's still nowhere near as good as my Mum's.

Moving around. This weekend is the calm before the storm. For a change, we're having a quiet night in but then this week Rachel goes to Rio a day after her birthday (which is on the 3rd) for meetings. That leaves me to babysit Nelson who, poor lad, is not suffering gladly (as I write) a tooth coming through. And then, in two weeks time, thanks to cheap tickets with TAM airlines, Rachel and I have a few days away in Chile! The Grandparents will be on babysitting duty and we will pop over to Santiago via Sao Paulo. Roberto, a friend of mine from my MA in York, and his wife Paula are Chileans and live in the capital. Fortunately, they are about and so we will get to see the sites with local tour guides.

Wonderwall. I tried something new in some of my classes this week. I got Advanced level students to write new words to Oasis' song Wonderwall, and then we sang our efforts in class. I wrote the chorus but they wrote the verses. Our version is named Midway Mall after Natal's biggest Shopping Centre. The results are, well, surprising. Oasis lyrics were never the most profound so I feel our effort runs them pretty close... more info on my teacher site here (once there, you need to scroll down to see it).

Busy week. We seemed to have found ourselves in a busy week. I don't have much time to write here before going back to my lesson planning. One reason for being busy is that teachers are being observed by managers this week. It's like in-house OFSTED for English teachers. Anyway, mine was yesterday and it went fine. I emailed my group before hand and told them to be nice to me and speak no Portuguese during class... they must all be exceedingly loyal as they were upright students for the whole period and didn't utter a peep of any language other than English.

Things I miss about England #21: not much gun crime. The shooting of a young boy in Liverpool last month and other news coming out of England suggests gun crime is on the up back home. In Brazil, it's a massive problem in built up areas and the mega-cities of Rio, Sao Paulo, Brasilia and Recife. In a referendum a couple of years back the Brazilian public voted to keep personal guns legal. It may seem like madness to vote this way, but it is a classic political catch 22. Nobody trusts the system to enforce the law, so they consider themselves better off with the option of having personal weapons for self-defence...

Anyway, little old Natal has the lowest crime for a state capital in Brazil, but that's not low enough for there not to be the occasional local horror story. This was all brought home recently with two incidents in the space of a week outside the English school. Two university students were mugged at gunpoint on Thursday and then on Sunday night some skirmish resulted in a young man being shot dead just down the road, again a supposed mugging. The news has spooked a few of the staff here, but I think the best response is to accept it happens, take every measure and care to ensure your safety and get on with life. Should anything happen, comply quickly with anybody who wants your money. (In Recife, Rio and Sao Paulo when people go out onto the streets they take an extra R$50 as "robber money" to pay off any threatening advances). But here we remain relatively safe. After all, so far there is no indication to me that what happens here is anything more than in Clifton where we lived in York...

Things I love about Brazil #50: the walk home. This might sound strange after what I mentioned above, but during the day the 5 minute amble to our house from the language school for lunch is one of life's little pleasures. Invariably, the sun will be shining, I can see the sand dunes and park to my left on the horizon. Just beyond them is the sea. I pass old folks sitting outside their house and I try to greet them jovially, even when they call me "Alemao" (German). At lunch time the streets are scented with the hazy aroma of beans and delicious Brazilian food. Then I pass the 5-a-side football pitch where some game might be going on, and over the square where the old men clunk their dominoes. Then it's past the pink Cathlic church, past the yellow building where folk practice singing for mass, turn right at the clinic onto our street and home... the stresses of the day just seem to ease off after this gentle stroll. And, I think I might be mad to ever consider swapping this for a commute on the London underground.

play.blogger.com. I've been enjoying a very clever little website that the people here at blogger.com have set up. Simply, every time a picture is uploaded to blogspot anywhere in the world, they display it live for all to see. This is happening so frequently the effect is of a never-ending slide show of random images. You can find out about any of the blogs in question or click straight to it from the picture. It's surprising how many people blog from Brazil! Anyway, through it, I've seen some very interesting photography and found some fascinating blogs. Give it a go here, at play.blogger.com.

Meet my new friend Adriano Lima, Paralympic gold medalist. On Tuesday I had the enormous privilege of interviewing Adriano Lima who is a student at Cultura Inglesa, Tirol unit. Adriano, who has minimal use of his legs, is a member with the Brazilian national swimming team. He has a gold medal from the Athens games where he was a winner in the relay. The medals he is holding in the picture are from this summer's Pan America Games which were in Rio. Adriano picked up seven gold medals, in front of a partisan home audience which included his wife and baby daughter Gabriella.

The reason for the interview is that Cultura produces an annual magazine which is given to parents and this will feature in it. Some excerpts from the article I'm working on about him:

How did his swimming career begin? Adriano, who has minimal use of both his legs, was not crippled from birth. He worked as construction worker until he was 17. But, 1990 was a fateful year for Adriano, as he fell off a high wall and broke his back, a terrible incident that was to deprive him of the use of his legs. This tragedy could have cut short Adriano’s hopes of a happy and fulfilled life. After what must have been three difficult years Adriano took to swimming and his evident skills were noticed. Soon, he was competing in his first competition in Recife at an event where he came home with a haul of gold medals. One year later, he was astonished to find himself on a plane to Italy, competing for his country internationally. Despite a harsh start to adult life Adriano seems free of bitterness in spite of the accident. “I’m very happy”, he says with a contended smile on his face. “I have no complaints about my life”.

I ask him about his routine, his training and diet. “Every day, I swim five hours and then I go to the gym for two hours”, he explains. “I never drink beer or soft drinks and never smoke”. And what food does a top class athlete like to eat? “I like to eat food like beans and rice. We eat a lot of fish and white meat to make us strong".

Nothing much to report (for once). It's been an average week, I'd say. Rach and Nelson have gone down to Recife again for Rachel's meetings so I'm home alone but the family will all hook up in Joao Pessoa for a night at a beach house tomorrow...

Amusing uses of English. We've been marking tests recently and so you know what that means? Funny English. I found Sueli, one of the other teachers marking tests from her children's group in the teachers room at Cultura. She was shaking her head ruefully while reading an error-strewn paper: "I stand on my eyes and I shut my knees... don't they listen to anything in class?"

My favourite from my students came in a test where students had to fill in a word in a sentence. The sentence was this: "My friend says that it is safe to shop on the internet as long as you use your common ________". Most of my class got the answer right, the word in the space should of course be "sense". But, one chap, using his imagination, put the word "computer". I gave him a mark as I could not dispute the grammatical correctness of the sentence even if it was a little surreal.

Lastly, a Brazilian showed me this so I sort of feel I have permission to forward it on in the name of good humour. Short clips of a Brazilian radio DJ trying to pronounce the name of UK/USA artists and songs. Clearly, this man never went to Cultura Inglesa. The clip is called "Radialista mestre do ingres" (which translates as Master DJ of Engrish) and you can watch it here.

Things I miss about England #67: less wildlife. We found this big moth on our wall the other day. He was about the size of a flying brick. He seemed a bit ill so we trapped him in a box and threw him out. Rachel called me a woos for generally flapping around like a big girls blouse when I saw it. What happened to the rugged missionary kid who would go out looking for critters under rocks? Nelson on the other hand was fearless. He poked at it with great authority. (Does anyone know what kind of moth this is? If my Uncle Les reads this blog, he'll know).

Seriously though, we have bats living in the tree outside our house and we find the odd scorpion and cockroach around our property. Of course, there are mozzies and flies too. And then, there are the stray cats and dogs. Especially with Nelson becoming increasingly independent, sometimes we'd prefer there to be slightly less disease or illness transmitting members of God's good creation around...

Things I love about Brazil #15: more wildlife. But, on the other hand, the wildlife can be astonishing. Rachel and Nelson had a great time watching monkeys at the park the other day. The birds (the feathered variety, boys!) are beautiful in Brazil, but it is a shame that so many of them end up as caged pets on our estate. Probably the most memorable wildlife we've seen was at Pipa beach when Ruth and Julian were here a while back. Just a few feet from the shore a dolphin leapt completely out the water three times, on the final occasion with a fresh silver fish in it's mouth. We were literally speechless at the sight. You don't see that in Skegness every day, do ya?

Nelsinho makes it onto Brazilian national cable TV on a programme about football. His Uncle Nelson sent a picture in of the young lad in a Nautico footy kit. You can watch the clip on You Tube.

Cultura Tirol. The whole family were up over the weekend helping move a Cultura school (in a part of Natal called Tirol) 500 yards down the road to a new building. It was a real family affair with even Rachel's brother coming up from Recife as one of a legion of computer geeks setting up the IT in the library. The new unit started taking students yesterday. I have a lesson over there this afternoon so I'll be seeing it in use for the first time today.

New idea for gaining clients for the language school. Following the car incident on Monday (see last post), everything, thanks to my Father in law, has been sorted A OK. The guy who I bumped is seriously toying with the idea of enrolling his family in Cultura Inglesa school. This sparked an idea with Steve over lunch that day...
S: "It may not be the most orthodox way to get clients for Cultura, but it seems to have worked".
Me: "Well, I'd be happy to bump into as many cars as you like around Natal to get more students for the school"
S: "Yeah, and after they get out the car to look at the damage you could say 'Are you tired of life in Natal? Why not learn a new language and get away from it all'"...

A bit about music. Yesterday, I had a boys night out jamming with Dyego (a teacher from Cultura and a good friend), Mariano (soon to emigrate to the USA - boo!) and Wesley (a cheerful Brazilian drummer who I had never met before). We played from the hours of 10pm to midnight at a rented studio, the only time we were all free. For two hours with hiring the cymbals we each paid R$7.50 - about £2.00. So, I couldn't complain about the good value.

I had to borrow a guitar (it wasn't the greatest work of art, I have to say). We mangled a few hits from REM, Radiohead, Elvis, Pearl Jam and the Goo Goo Dolls amongst others. We miss Mev here with his all round muscial nouse. I was singing for the most part so you can see it was a flawed venture from the start. Honestly, I think our efforts were what the word "shambolic" was invented to describe. But it was a laugh and we'll do the same next week with some more practice. Although, I'm exhausted today as after we packed up I had to drive Dyego and Wesley home as it was too late for their buses. Dyego and especially Wesley live out in the sticks (or "the boondocks" as my mother would say), and when I fell into bed at past 2.30am, after driving on deserted and sometimes unlit roads, I was reminded again by what a big, open place Brazil actually is.

A bit about photography. One of Brazil's greatest living icons is hardly known in his home country. Sebastiao Salgado is an award-winning, world-class photographer who documents (always in black and white) the plight of the poor, the working classes, those affected by war or famine or forced migration across the developing world. He has also exhibited pictures of wildlife, but it is his ability to capture something of the sadness and hope in people that has made him so famous.

I first found out about him about 8 years ago when I flicked through a book of his at my cousin Paul's house in Washington DC. Since then I saw with Rachel his Migration exhibition in London which was one of the most moving (and shocking) things I have ever witnessed.

Salgado has just opened an exhibition in London about coffee workers in Ethiopia, Brazil, India and Guatamala. See it if you can! A good place to find out about Salgado is here on the Guardian website which has a whole section devoted to him.

Student blog. This semester I tried a new idea which has worked quite well - a blog, in English, for my students. I post details of tests, homework and links to good websites on there. But, I also use it as a board to put more interesting things on - videos, pictures (of the students or their work) and anything else I find that might keep them interested. Sometimes the site gets 30 hits a day so it seems to be working. Related to the information above, I just posted a video on there with clips of Sebastiao Salgado's photography. The video was put together by a Brazilian hoping to raise awareness of Salgado's work. My website is: teacherdavenatal.wordpress.com. Take a look!

I hate Mondays. In the manner of Garfield, I have had quite a Monday morning. It all began when Nelson's nappy was so full I got wee on my fresh trousers and shirt and it was a struggle to get Nelson to eat his papaya for breakfast. Several niggly things later, I've dropped Rach at work and am in the car with Nelson and we're pulling onto a main road. Next moment I hear a crunch. I've pranged the back of the car in front of me. Nobody hurt, no damage to us, minor (but expensive!) damage to him. To be fair, it is a notorious junction which involves pulling into a lane of moving traffic. I was so busy checking my mirrors and blind spot I hadn't noticed the guy in front of me had come to a hault.

There's nothing quite like bashing somebody else's car to dry up the flow of one's already frazzled Portuguese. I managed to call Rach who came down and efficiently set about sorting us all out. Unfortunately she accidentally locked the car keys in our car in the process. Mondays! But a short phone call later and a man with an orange shirt shows up on a motorbike. He is a chaveiro (key guy) and manages to get into our car within 30 seconds... (worringly fast if you ask me!). One problem solved.

Steve and Celia show up, somebody else takes Nelson to school. We wait for the traffic police to arrive. After nearly two hours they appear. It turns out a much worse incident occurred further up the road which they had to deal with first. When they do come they are helpful and efficient, albeit slightly confused about the paperwork for me, an estrangeiro. They are seriously "pimped" traffic police with endless gadgets hanging off their belts and proiminant hands-free cellphones draped over their ears. One guy has a pair of aviators on and the other a pair of fake RayBan sunglasses... I'm reminded of the Independence Day parade when all the uniformed forces marched past us (see last blog). On that occasion, the traffic police, with painted faces, had dressed up as traffic lights and could have passed for circus clowns. But on Monday morning, these "real" traffic police before me cut much more imposing figures.

Actually, I was very thankful to God this whole thing hadn't been worse. It could have been a disastrous Monday morning if somebody had got hurt or it had been more serious. Our car was fine, our friend's will need a bit of work but not much. The chap I bumped was quite banterous and took the occasion to chat with Steve about the possibility of sending his kids to Cultura Inglesa... Never one to miss a business opportunity, Steve filled him in on all the details. Brazilians, thankfully, they just seem never seem to get too stressed about it all.

Amy and Steve's birthday. Monday mornings always follow weekends and we did, it's true, have a very good weekend. My father and sister-in-law share birthdays and so the whole family were here with some cousins and friends thrown in for good measure. We relaxed by the pool on Sunday and ate some good shrimp followed by chocolate cake for lunch.

Football update: America don't lose! In the evening we went off to watch America RN play against Sport Recife. At least our local team didn't lost this time - but they will dissapointed to have only drawn 1-1 in a game they could have won. Pita (Rachel's cousin who was with us in York for a year) was one of those around and he's a big Sport fan so we sat in the away supporters end. Since America have started losing so much their support has dwindled. There may have been more away fans at this match than home fans. The huge Machadao stadium was mostly empty.

Football update: time to start supporting another team? Earlier that day, by the pool, Steve got chatting to a guy who it turns out is on the board of ABC, America's local rivals. This chap promptly gave us free ABC shirts there and then and promised us the chance to sit in his executive box at the next ABC game. Now, ABC are in Brazil's third division and I have been to their stadium before. Can't say I really noticed any boxes anywhere, let alone executive ones, but it's a nice gesture. If we do this my conscience will be pricked. Supporting a team is like being married... it seems very sinful to leave ones first love for another model even if the second comes with lots of freebies. America or ABC, who to support?

Things I miss about England #80: Gas from the mains. As part of the weekend festivities I cooked up a (mock) Brazilian curry for everyone on Saturday night. The gas for our oven comes from a container, which decided to run out when I had things boiling on all the hobs. Thankfully, Steve managed to find a place who filled it up, even late at night on a Saturday. Thank the Lord, the curry was saved.

Things I love about Brazil #24: Match day snacks. Watching football live in Brazil is half about the game and half about the associated atmosphere. A big part of the latter is the endless stream of snack vendors who try to convince you to purchase their beer, soft drinks, water, tic-tacs, popcorn and an endless assortment of other goodies. Personally, I wouldn't trust anything with meat or cheese in (you have no idea where it comes from or how it's been cooked!). But for the equivalent of about £2 per match you could have a couple of beers, some cashew nuts and, my favourite, churros - sort of long sugary doughnuty things with caramel sauce inside. I ate three yesterday and didn't need dinner after that.

Church. Rachel's Mum babysat the boy on Sunday morning which gave us a chance to have the rare luxury of getting over to church and sitting, uninterrupted, for the duration of the service. I was pleased I could make out some of Pastor Gerson's sermon. It's not easy with the echo from the microphone but he preached about the cross, saying it was the greatest work of God. Sound theology if you ask me.

After about twenty minutes the heat set in making it difficult to concentrate in any case. The building they use is like a warehouse and is in the process of being renovated and developed. To keep it cool they have about 20 fans on full power hanging from the ceiling and attached to the walls. It's like sitting underneath a fleet of helicopters. Sadly, the desired cooling effect is not as it should be. Most of the congregation and the pastor are wilting by the end...

Brazilian Independence Day. September 7th 1822 is the date formerly recognised as when Brazil became independent from their colonial masters Portugal, although it seems the historical reading needs to be a bit more nuanced than just remembering that one date. (See Wikipedia entry here). My students spoke about Independence day to me yesterday. One lad pointed out: "We gained our political independence on this date, but we still have not gained our economic independence from the USA and other wealthy nations". Even if this is another simplification of a very complex discussion, he is not the only young Brazilian I've met to voice this opinion.

So, today was (another!) public holiday and the three of us went off with Mariano, Babi and family to watch the Brazilian Independence Day parade. This involved all the armed forces, volunteer forces and essentially anybody who wears a uniform marching by through the morning. There was also a brief show of strength from the air (see pic) - Natal has an airbase which trains Brazilian pilots. We all had a great time, including Nelson, who loved the noise, the military vehicles and probably would've enjoyed the dogs and horses if he had been awake to see them.

With such a big crowd closely packed around us we were careful to keep a close eye on our cameras and wallets. But, I comforted myself with the fact that if anything should happen we could call on any number of uniformed agents to come to our aid: be it the police, the traffic police, the military police, the riot police, the lifeguards, the dog trainers, the Calvary, the parachute regiment, the veterans, the girl scouts, the boy cubs, firefighters, the Seventh Day Adventist marching band or the quad-bike-riding sand dune force of the environmental police... the list goes on.

Natal fashion week. Rachel and Amy have gone with Barbara to this tonight leaving me and Celia alone to babysit the boy. It gives me some extra time for bloggage...

Raul Seixas. One of my students leant me a CD of the music of the late Raul Seixas recently. Rachel says he is the man that brought rock'n'roll to Brazil. Actually, the CD I'm listening to is circa 1973 and is absolutely brilliant. It's like Elvis meets Johnny Cash and Leonard Cohen and the three of them go off, learn Portuguese, record an album and voila! There are a handful of videos on Youtube if you search under his name. For a very bad example of his abilities, check out the strange, surreal song in English about a magic train (dare I say it, perhaps created under the influence of chemicals whose provenance may not be strictly legitimate). View it here.

Juliette Fandrich. Congrats to my cousin Sarah and her husband Martin on the arrival of their second daughter!

Things I miss about England #70: Reading the paper. Julian Kenny kindly left me a copy of the Telegraph when he visited last week. There's nothing like sitting back on the sofa and opening a broadsheet.

Things I love about Brazil #11: Help. Some people might think it lazy of us or perhaps a reversion to a colonial exploitative era to employ house help. You might especially think this when I say we pay less than £10 for a full day's work. But really, it's a win-win situation. With Nelson trashing the house on an hourly basis it helps to have an extra pair of hands for washing and cleaning. Secondly, it provides valuable employment for somebody, and our pay (which includes lunch and breakfast) is fair given the local Brazilian economy. Having somebody about the place during the day is good for security if we are all out too. In fact, NOT hiring if you have the means to is seen as being miserly and stingy. We had people enquiring about working the moment we got here.

First we had Miriam and now it's Ana. Both women appear to be somewhat ageless in appearance. I'd place them anywhere between 25 and 45. I think this is because they carry a worldly-wise look about them that suggests the experience of years, but they both seem to have the stamina, energy and strength of a beach volleyball team.

Ana does a great job keeping the house in order two days a week. She fixes great beans and fresh pineapple juice. She is constantly perplexed by my attempts to speak Portuguese and we often get our wires crossed. But last Friday she inadvertently revealed her age to us. We were talking about kids and she mentioned that her eldest was nearly 22. I was shocked! Mentally, I figured, if she had had kids in her twenties, this must place her, at the very least, in the latter part of my age estimate. But then came the punch line: her first was born when she was 15! And I'll leave you to do the math...

Vegetarian student - an update. During my lesson earlier today we asked our young friend who turned vegetarian how he was doing (see last Saturday's entry for full story). This is what he said: "I tried to be a vegetarian. I lasted nearly a week. But yesterday my friends and I all went to Burger King and I couldn't resist...". I asked him if he would consider taking it up again. " I think that from now on if I am on my own in the house I will not eat meat a lot, but it is too difficult to say no always!"

Rachel the dancing queen. Up until now Rachel has not really had anything she could describe as a personal hobby away from Nelson or I, the family or the Cultura Inglesa language school. So I was really pleased that today her and Amy were able to get off to a two hour belly dance class. Seriously, Rachel wanted to dance and this was the only thing available at a suitable time and with places free. Rachel came back all wobbly-kneed after the work out... but with tummy muscles toned to the strength and consistency of a granite ironing board. I'll keep a close eye on Rachel's belly in the next few weeks and post updates here.

Nelson's first uniform. Pictured, Nelson in his Primeiros Passos uniform. The first day out of civies into his new school clothes was last Friday. My wee lad's all growed up. I don't know where he learned to pose like a model in a mail order catalogue. Perhaps his fashion guru Tia Amy taught him some tips on staring purposefully into the distance while propping oneself up at a jaunty angle.